jocke

En god latter forlenger livet. – Sitat ukjent

Med denne posten vil jeg forhåpentligvis bidra til at du lever litt lengre – og det er jo en bra ting!

Man kan finne på mye morro med variabelnavn når man programmerer :)

 byte me;
 long john_silver;
 char broiled;
 string vest;
 float valve;
 double jeopardy;
 struct by_lightning { ... };
 Object strongly;
 class warfare { ... };
 String cheese;
 Exception taken;
 Graphics ex; // XXX
 long walk(short pier) { } // from the MrBunny Java book
 int elligence;
 bool me_over;
 short circus;
 int eger; // ...completing what the designers of the language left out
 char acter;
 bool ean;
 void* bowels;
 class Brick implements Throwable { }
 class Marathon implements Runnable { }
 class Novel implements Serializable { }
 class Human implements Cloneable { }
 Fun(key) %% funky!
 public MyTestCase(String man) {
	super(man);
 }
 throw (fit | up | something);
 while (e_coyote) {

Og har du noensinne prøvd å skrive ‘make love’ i terminalen på en *nix distro? Mange av dem har nemlig et artig tillegg i ‘makefile’.

love: /dev/null
       @echo not war?

En gang i blandt får folk ideer som ikke er helt gjennomtenkt. Produktene på bildene under er av den typen.

Dette er antatt (morro er det uansett) til å være reelle vedlikeholdsklager fra US Air Force piloter, samt tilbakemeldingen fra vedlikeholdscrewet:

Problem:  "Left inside main tire almost needs replacement."
Solution: "Almost replaced left inside main tire." 

Problem:  "Test flight OK, except autoland very rough."
Solution: "Autoland not installed on this aircraft."

Problem #1:  "#2 Propeller seeping prop fluid."
Solution #1: "#2 Propeller seepage normal."
Problem #2:  "#1, #3, and #4 propellers lack normal seepage."

Problem:    "The autopilot doesn't."
Signed off: "IT DOES NOW."

Problem:  "Something loose in cockpit."
Solution: "Something tightened in cockpit."

Problem:  "Evidence of hydraulic leak on right main landing gear."
Solution: "Evidence removed."

Problem:  "DME volume unbelievably loud."
Solution: "Volume set to more believable level."

Problem:  "Dead bugs on windshield."
Solution: "Live bugs on order."

Problem:  "Autopilot in altitude hold mode produces a 200 fpm descent."
Solution: "Cannot reproduce problem on ground."

Problem:  "IFF inoperative."
Solution: "IFF always inoperative in OFF mode."

Problem:  "Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick."
Solution: "That's what they're there for."

Problem:  "Number three engine missing."
Solution: "Engine found on right wing after brief search."

Her er et utdrag av feilmeldinger fra Apple’s MPW kompilator:

• “String literal too long (I let you have 512 characters, that’s 3 more than ANSI said I should)”
• “…And the lord said, `lo, there shall only be case or default labels inside a switch statement’”
• “a typedef name was a complete surprise to me at this point in your program”
• “`Volatile’ and `Register’ are not miscible”
• “This struct already has a perfectly good definition”
• “Only one parameter per register please “
• “type in (cast) must be scalar; ANSI 3.3.4; page 39, lines 10-11 (I know you don’t care, I’m just trying to annoy you)”
• “This array has no size, and that’s bad”
• “Huh ?”
• “can’t go mucking with a `void *’”
• “we already did this function”
• “The target of this goto is a label in a block that has an automatic variable with an initializer”
• “This label is the target of a goto from outside of the block containing this label AND this block has an automatic variable with an initializer AND your window wasn’t wide enough to read this whole error message”
• “Call me paranoid but finding `/*’ inside this comment makes me suspicious”
• “This function has an explicit return type and deserves a return value”
• “You are comparing two structures that have holes in them”
• “Too many errors on one line (make fewer)”
• “Symbol table full – fatal heap error; please go buy a RAM upgrade from your local Apple dealer”
• “Trailing comma not permitted in enum definition. (This time I’m letting you off with a warning)”